I am beginning to feel that I am mostly sad about other people’s problems.
14 Comments
What kind of sadness, do you feel bad that they’re in that situation? Would you like to elaborate on it?
By sad I mean a combination of worrying, looking for solutions, the grind with meeting and dealing with people who have zero regard for humanism even though they are wearing the cloak of humanitarian workers. Then there is administration and people full of pride and power. I am constantly being reminded of being a simple person who is incapable of taking harsh and undue stances. This sums up to handling of situations where everything that I am doing that ends up bothering me are the works that don’t relate to me directly.
The other day I talked to my relative about this. They said, complaining like this only pertains to saying that the country the is Modi’s problem and it doesn’t effect you directly. I do agree to ripple effects though.
But this is what i feel.
Let me know if I got this right.
You feel like helping others because you seem to care for them because they’re in some problem but that caring of yours is making you to do be in situations which you do not like to be in? And you also feel bad about how the world operates.
Off topic:
If I remember correctly, you do not play games that have these seizure warnings right? Because you don’t feel good while you play it no matter how much you like it.
You have understood it well. Internally I feel that selfishness is finally growing in me. I have long tried to be “Me” holding to my beliefs and morals. But slowly and slowly I feel I am drifting to become something I do not want to be but the my present condition demands it.
Off topic issue: I couldn’t play the games that have huge particle effects display. Like Genshin Impact combat. And I’m curious to know, why did you ask this?
Cool, nice.
Another off topic:
Do you remember this phone call conversation we had?
I was telling you that I couldn’t say no to people who reached out to me for help related to editing and other things.
And I was not feeling good inside doing those works but I had to do it forcefully because I just couldn’t say no because they had reached out as they had problems.
Then you told me to teach you some bad words in my regional language for which I said no, I can’t teach those because I don’t use them.
You tried a couple of times insisting me to teach you but I refused all the time.
Then you said, “how did you say ‘no’ for this request? In a similar way you just say no to them and remember that you have to be in good shape before you can take care of others.
If you help them or not, it doesn’t matter.. if you’re not there they will find help somehow.”
Do you remember this conversation?
I don’t really remember the full conversation but given I am me I would have said the same thing. Perhaps I am am at a crossroads where is feel the paths dividing. It feels I am waiting for the right time which I dearly know will never arrive.
No problem, well you just now have to connect the dots of what I have said in these conversations.
You have given me the solution to the problem you’re facing right now when I was facing it back then.
Please be kind to remind me.
I have, whatever I have mentioned in this post is the solution for your problem.
Fair point. Guess it’s time to dig deep into the study about me learning to say no and then living with it.
Glad that you managed to grasp what I tried to convey through off topic discussions 😃
If you’re not happy in doing something then I think that you shouldn’t be doing it.
Ofcourse there are few things that you might have to do because of responsibility and stuff.
But those that you feel that should not be your responsibility you shouldn’t take it up.
See what would be the consequences of it if you stopped doing it, if you’re okay with the outcome and you’re at peace then it’s best for you.
Be alert while you do this… There will be signs guiding you to help you.
Are there any specific tells about signs you mentioned. Could you give me an example?
I will tell an example in my case.
When my manager reached out to me for working at his company again I did not feel like joining because something inside said no.
I put lots of conditions and reasonings to avoid the proposal but he agreed to all my conditions and everything was in my favor.
I had to agree to it because I was feeling bad for him and at the same time he did agree to everything I put towards him but during all these conversations and even while I was saying yes to the proposal and even after that I felt uneasy and not good deep inside.
3 months later I quit the job & I think you might know why.
What kind of sadness, do you feel bad that they’re in that situation? Would you like to elaborate on it?
By sad I mean a combination of worrying, looking for solutions, the grind with meeting and dealing with people who have zero regard for humanism even though they are wearing the cloak of humanitarian workers. Then there is administration and people full of pride and power. I am constantly being reminded of being a simple person who is incapable of taking harsh and undue stances. This sums up to handling of situations where everything that I am doing that ends up bothering me are the works that don’t relate to me directly.
The other day I talked to my relative about this. They said, complaining like this only pertains to saying that the country the is Modi’s problem and it doesn’t effect you directly. I do agree to ripple effects though.
But this is what i feel.
Let me know if I got this right.
You feel like helping others because you seem to care for them because they’re in some problem but that caring of yours is making you to do be in situations which you do not like to be in? And you also feel bad about how the world operates.
Off topic:
If I remember correctly, you do not play games that have these seizure warnings right? Because you don’t feel good while you play it no matter how much you like it.
You have understood it well. Internally I feel that selfishness is finally growing in me. I have long tried to be “Me” holding to my beliefs and morals. But slowly and slowly I feel I am drifting to become something I do not want to be but the my present condition demands it.
Off topic issue: I couldn’t play the games that have huge particle effects display. Like Genshin Impact combat. And I’m curious to know, why did you ask this?
Cool, nice.
Another off topic:
Do you remember this phone call conversation we had?
I was telling you that I couldn’t say no to people who reached out to me for help related to editing and other things.
And I was not feeling good inside doing those works but I had to do it forcefully because I just couldn’t say no because they had reached out as they had problems.
Then you told me to teach you some bad words in my regional language for which I said no, I can’t teach those because I don’t use them.
You tried a couple of times insisting me to teach you but I refused all the time.
Then you said, “how did you say ‘no’ for this request? In a similar way you just say no to them and remember that you have to be in good shape before you can take care of others.
If you help them or not, it doesn’t matter.. if you’re not there they will find help somehow.”
Do you remember this conversation?
I don’t really remember the full conversation but given I am me I would have said the same thing. Perhaps I am am at a crossroads where is feel the paths dividing. It feels I am waiting for the right time which I dearly know will never arrive.
No problem, well you just now have to connect the dots of what I have said in these conversations.
You have given me the solution to the problem you’re facing right now when I was facing it back then.
Please be kind to remind me.
I have, whatever I have mentioned in this post is the solution for your problem.
Fair point. Guess it’s time to dig deep into the study about me learning to say no and then living with it.
Glad that you managed to grasp what I tried to convey through off topic discussions 😃
If you’re not happy in doing something then I think that you shouldn’t be doing it.
Ofcourse there are few things that you might have to do because of responsibility and stuff.
But those that you feel that should not be your responsibility you shouldn’t take it up.
See what would be the consequences of it if you stopped doing it, if you’re okay with the outcome and you’re at peace then it’s best for you.
Be alert while you do this… There will be signs guiding you to help you.
Are there any specific tells about signs you mentioned. Could you give me an example?
I will tell an example in my case.
When my manager reached out to me for working at his company again I did not feel like joining because something inside said no.
I put lots of conditions and reasonings to avoid the proposal but he agreed to all my conditions and everything was in my favor.
I had to agree to it because I was feeling bad for him and at the same time he did agree to everything I put towards him but during all these conversations and even while I was saying yes to the proposal and even after that I felt uneasy and not good deep inside.
3 months later I quit the job & I think you might know why.